Seasonal Insanity

We've been observing the night of the giver for 11 years now. 12 years ago we had one of those material mayhem Christmas mornings. The kids were in the midst of a present opening frenzy. They didn't care what was in it & would throw it down & start tearing into another one. It was like watching a pride of lions tear apart their prey. Something in me just blew. I informed Elizabeth that there would be NO gifts next year. Christmas as we knew it would be canceled! As you can imagine, she was not hip to my patriarchal edict. She knew "Christmas Morning" was a problem but was not about to embrace such a radical solution. We have a great relationship & I can count on one hand the number of real "disagreements" we've had in nearly 20 years of marriage. This was one of them. We decided to table the discussion & pray about it for a week. We then sat down & rationally discussed the problem & what values we wanted to weave into the warp & woof of our children's souls. That was the key. We both agreed on the problem & on the values. First, we wanted to exalt Christ & give him the spotlight on Christmas morning. Second, we wanted our children to learn the joy of giving & to practically experience the joy of giving. Through our collaboration we crafted "The Night of the Giver". Each family member, just four of us then, would have a "Night" in which they would give their gift to each person. They were to plan the entire evening's events. There were to "catches". One: The Giver received no gift but the gift of giving to others. Two: The Giver had to pay for the gifts & the evening's events. We did help the children with extra jobs to help them earn their money.
Our new tradition worked marvelously! Our boys started in June by earning money and saving it for their "Night". Even that first year we saw massive improvement. The boys never once complained about not receiving a gift on their night. They were thrilled to give a meaningful gift to each family member & then to plan the meal & entertainment for the evening. One year my son Zachary, about 6 at the time, found a $100 brief case at the office supply store for $10. On his night he was so excited as he gave me my gift that he literally ran around me in circles. I still use that same brief case some 10 years later. Elizabeth & I are able to give our major gifts to the children & to each other on our nights & that way Christmas morning is reserved for Christ. We can sit around the tree, read the Advent account in scripture, sing carols & thank God for his indescribable gift in Christ.
One of the neat perks of the night of the giver is that we get to celebrate for 6 days now instead of just one. Elizabeth usually takes the family out for dinner & a Christmas movie. Then when we get home she'll give her gifts. This year my gift was a trip to the Creation Museum just outside of Cincinnati Ohio. We left at 4 am Saturday morning so we could get there in time. I can tell you that they loved it & were so surprised. Anna really has a heart for others & she will often bake cookies on the morning of her night & then we will go caroling to the shut ins in our church and give them cookies as part of her evening's activities. I still have a Popsicle stick pencil holder on my desk given to me by Paul Jr. on his first ever night of the giver. It means more to me than anything else on that desk.
The night of the giver has evolved over the years. We are now seeing gifts of time & or events rather than material things. Ellie took us all ice skating at the civic center one year for her gift. We are also seeing an outward focus on others. The Night of the Giver has truly met & exceeded our goals. Many other families over the years have adapted it & embraced the concept as their own. We are thrilled to see our children working to earn money ,falling in love with giving, and most importantly - giving Jesus the glory due his name.